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Emotional abuse


Emotional abuse

The signs of emotional abuse are sometimes difficult to detect. Unlike physical abuse, emotional abuse often takes place without those around the victim realizing it.

Worst of all is that the victim does not realize it either because the depth of the abuse tends to increase in a crescendo way, which makes it gradually justify the mistreatment that it would have. never had to accept from the start.

Emotional abuse can be more harmful than physical abuse because it can undermine how we think about ourselves.

It can cripple whatever we're meant to be: we allow it, and we turn it into something wrong that makes us define ourselves wrongly.

Emotional abuse can happen between parents and children, between husband and wife, between relatives, between co-workers and bosses, and between friends.

The abuser tends to project their words, attitudes or actions onto the victim (s) they have chosen.

This is one of his favorite strategies for evading any cognitive conflict that can cast doubt on his false self-esteem.

It is also a way of attacking that of the victim, making her dependent and creating in her a sense of distress or abandonment.

So, how do we identify if we are the victims of emotional abuse?

Answering the questions we ask you can help you see more clearly in your questioning:

Humiliation, degradation, negation, judgment and criticism:

  • Is there anyone who laughs at you or humiliates you in front of others? Is he / she laughing at you, using sarcasm as a way to belittle or degrade you?
  • Does he / she tell you that your opinions or feelings are “bad” or don't matter?
  • Does anyone regularly ridicule you, reject you, ignore your opinions, thoughts, suggestions and feelings?

Domination, control and shame:

  • Do you think this person treats you like a child?
  • Is she constantly correcting you or punishing you because your behavior is “inappropriate”?
  • Do you feel like you have to "ask permission" before you go somewhere or do something, even when you are making small decisions?
  • Does he / she control your spending?
  • How does he / she treat you if you were inside him / her?
  • Does he / she make you feel like he / she is always right?
  • Does he / she remind you of your faults?
  • Does he / she underestimate your successes, aspirations, plans and even who you are?
  • Does he / she disapprove with disdain and / or pejoratively your looks, your comments, your behavior?

Accusation and guilt, trivial and unreasonable demands, denial of one's own faults:

  • Is he / she accusing you of something wrong when he / she knows it's not true?
  • Is he / She unable to laugh at him / herself?
  • Is he / she extremely sensitive when it comes to other people making fun of him or her, or making a comment that seems to show disrespect?
  • Does he / she apologize for his / her problems?
  • Does he / she apologize because of his / her behavior or tend to make others feel guilty or the circumstances surrounding their mistakes?
  • What does he / she call you? By your first name, a nickname or a nickname?
  • Does he / she blame you for his problems or his misfortune?
  • Does he / she continually disrespect you?

Emotional distance and silence, isolation, abandonment or emotional neglect:

  • Is he / she using attention or affection blackmail?
  • Does he / she not want to do his / her homework or use neglect or abandonment as punishment?
  • Is he / she playing at blaming you instead of taking responsibility for his / her actions and attitudes?
  • Does he / she not realize or pay attention to how you are feeling?
  • Does he / she not empathize with you or ask questions for information?

Codependency and entanglement:

  • Does anyone treat you as a full person but as an extension of themselves?
  • Is he / she not protecting your personal boundaries and sharing information with you that you don't agree with?
  • Do you suffer disrespect for your requests and do what others think is right for you?
  • Do you need continuous contact and haven't developed a healthy support network among your friends or life partners?


If you answered yes to any of these questions, consider the possibility of actively confronting the person who is harming you.Talk about what is happening to you with people you trust, because your detractor is counting on you going to shut up.

Take away from him the image of the kind and understanding person in front of others. Finally, and most importantly, get professional help and follow-up and get rid of the intruder now, because no one should be able to trample on your life.